I came across this week’s QOTD while getting lost in the beautiful chaos that is Tumblr (Are you on Tumblr? Follow me!). It’s the kind of quote that immediately brings to mind the gut-wrenching feeling of THAT MOMENT. I’m sure that we all have it — that moment where everything changed and our lives were never the same.
Luckily, my MOMENT didn’t taint the memory of my past or what I thought I knew about my life up until that point. Instead, it changed the way I felt moving forward. I’ve always considered myself an “old soul,” but the aftermath of the MOMENT made me grow up even more. My sense of justice and fairness were skewed. It was hard for me to trust implicitly or to rely on others completely. I developed a lot of anxieties and control issues that I had never experienced before. But that’s not what this post is about.
Instead, I think it’s important to reflect on the moments that changed us. We may never understand the “why’s,” but engaging in a little introspection about the reasons for the emotions involved can help us move forward.
I am the kind of person who is forever curious, so I will always wonder. I’ll always want to know what I could have done differently to make the events of my life turn out better. However, after looking back and realizing why I felt a certain way (instead of how things happened), I can make adjustments to my life going forward to make sure I don’t feel like that anymore. It’s not about blame. It’s about taking responsibility and the control of your life back.
I’ll never be that naive girl I used to be, but I’m stronger now. I believe that the truth, however painful, is better than saccharine lies. I’m more realistic and confident. I hate that I had my MOMENT, but I don’t hate the person I became because of it. So that’s what I hold onto.